Chihuahua Or Muffin? Searching For The Best Computer Vision API

You've probably seen this internet meme demonstrating the alarming resemblance of chihuahuas and muffins. Everyone in the AI industry (including myself) loves putting the image in their presentations. But, one question I haven't seen anyone answer rigorously is: just how good IS modern AI at disambiguating between a chihuahua and a muffin? For your entertainment and education, I'll be investigating this question today. Binary classification has been possible ever since the perceptron algorithm was invented in 1957.